Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
