i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
In the future we'll all be gay
sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
I deserve to be covered in dicks
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
Randomize
