Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
Randomize
