Me. At least after what I've been through.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
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