if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Randomize
