the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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