I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
i came on her dog
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
Randomize
