Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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