How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
