ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
Randomize
