Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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