it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
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