Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
i'm signing you up for texting rehab
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
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