hotel room ftw
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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