i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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