I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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