Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
