In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
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