Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
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