did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
