So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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