Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
Randomize