HIV tests are more positive than that guy
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
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