so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
Randomize
