I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
You took a bar mat shot.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Randomize
