Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Randomize
