She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
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