maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
