So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
