god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
