I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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