okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
I'm gonna invite every single tinder date I've had to my birthday. Let them fight, battle Royale style. The winner gets to fuck me. \n\nBest. Birthday. Ever
Randomize