guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
Randomize
