if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
