I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
Randomize