somebody snuck up and got me drunk
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Randomize
