i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
I think pants incapable of making pants work
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize
