Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize
