Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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