Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
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