i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Randomize
