Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
Randomize