my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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