the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
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