I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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