how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Randomize
