i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
