So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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