im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Randomize
