My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Randomize
