i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Randomize
